Whadaya Got? I’ll Buy.

I’m a sucker for any kid selling anything. Probably because I remember going door-to-door as a kid for the Cub Scouts, my school, my sports team, or whatever other fundraisers I was involved in.

I’m by far the easiest mark in my neighborhood. The kids all know that no matter what kind of junk they’re selling, and for whatever cause, I’ll buy. Not only will I buy, I’ll buy from all of them. If three kids from three different families are all selling something for the same cause, I’ll buy something from each of them. I can’t help it. Maybe I’m just a capitalist at heart, and seeing kids trying their hands at sales just sparks nostalgia. But the other day something happened that has shaken my suckerishness (if there is such a word).

I was walking out of Stop and Shop and ran into a group of Cub Scouts selling pop corn.

“Hi, would you like to buy some pop corn?” the young salesman said.

Sure,” I said. “Whadaya got?”

“We have this one, and this one, and this one,” he said. He pointed to a box of microwave popcorn, a bag of kernels for the old-fashion fans, and a small tin of chocolate covered popcorn.

“Chocolate cover sounds good,” I said. “I’ll take that one.”

“Sixteen dollars, please,” the boy said.

Ouch. $16 bucks for a small tin of popcorn and now I was stuck. I can walk away and look like a cheapskate or I can pony up the $16 and feel ripped off. Either way I lose. As the dad came over to take my $20 and get me my change, I asked if the boys were going for their Gouging Badge. I got an uncomfortable laugh back. A laugh that suggested he didn’t like the prices either.

“Thanks for supporting our troop,” the boy said. He showed a toothy smile. The capitalist in me smiled back and my heart melted again. It’s a good thing the kid wasn’t selling something really expensive or we would all be in trouble. I walked away with my $16 chocolate-covered popcorn — the stuff tastes good, I’ll give them that. Or maybe I’m still trying to justify being grifted by a kid.